


Glimmer

by Cdrash13



Series: Glimmer part 1 [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Denial of Feelings, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Love Triangles, Possessive Behavior, Protective Bucky Barnes, Rough Sex, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Sloppy Makeouts, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Soft Muriel (The Arcana), Tender Sex, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:01:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21888607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cdrash13/pseuds/Cdrash13
Summary: Armen was the epitome of the Irish dream girl.Hard-working, bubbly, full of energy, and willing to help and serve others. Her biggest flaw though? She tends to run away from her feelings. If she isn't running away from her childhood friend in Ireland, she's running away from her complicated relationship with the infamous Bucky Barnes.Leaving  Ireland to become a trauma counselor for the Avengers, while making friends along the way.This is a story of three people that are terrible at communication but feel deeply for a girl who doesn't know where she stands in the world.A certain Winter Solider doesn't know where he stands with the counselor. He just knows he likes her...but is that enough for him to create something with her? or will he abandon ship before something can even begin?She needs to evaluate the circumstances while two men struggle to face the emotions they feel for her.
Relationships: Apprentice/Muriel (The Arcana), James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s), James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, Muriel (The Arcana)/Reader, Muriel (The Arcana)/You
Series: Glimmer part 1 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1576735
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	1. A cluttered beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there cinnamon rolls! 
> 
> Thanks for reading <3
> 
> I had posted this before, but I wasn't happy with the story I created. I also had a lot of demands to deliver more often...which stressed me out...A LOT. 
> 
> So! here's Glimmer! THE REMIX lol 
> 
> Read endnotes for some more explanations. 
> 
> Not proof read.

Armen was comfortably nestled into the oversized armchair near one of the living room windows. Her breathing steady and relaxed as she trailed her fingers over her favorite handmade quilt. Worn with time from constant use, the edges of the quilt were gently frayed, how often had she used this quilt for picnics or to sit upon while reading a book. Her mind drifted to her housemate and childhood friend, Muriel. Who had often sat upon the same worn-out quilt with her? She caught a slight movement in her peripheral vision, just outside of the window.

Off in the distance towards the edge of the property stood a tall hulking figure in the early morning hours. Normally, one would be concerned if they saw what looked like a bulky man of 6.10...but Armen knew better. She smiled towards the figure, not that he could see it, but he knew she was there...it was his home that she is residing in after all. 

The cottage sat on the edge of a forest, nestled in lush greens with hints of heather that littered the hills and valleys around the home. A small farm was off to the side, giving shelter to gentle sheep that Armen often catered too. Honey bees were not far from the home, the tiny creatures were a favorite of hers and she deeply enjoyed learning how to care for them during her stay in Ireland. Then there are the chickens...her housemates favorite critter. Armen often found her hulking man, Muriel, quickly chit-chatting with the birds. She could never repress the smile and giggles that bubbled up inside of her when catching him gently holding a baby chick in his large hands.

Her time here with Muriel was kind, peaceful, and therapeutic. The inside of the glen, as they called it, was humble and simplistic. Cream colored walls lined the house, Muriel wasn’t fond of decor, so there were no pictures to occupy space for the eyes. However, Armen had talked her childhood friend into painting his living a warm fern green to compliment that dark wood floors that ran through the tiny cottage; she knew green is his favorite color...she also wanted to add a little life to the home. 

He begrudgingly agreed. Muriel even allowed her to place flower diagrams above the brick fireplace in the living room, he didn’t mind her decorating a little if it allowed him to be graced with her pretty smiles and delighted giggles. It didn’t take long for Armen’s life to meld into Muriels, her small collection of books she had brought with her had taken the space on his shelves, intertwined with his medical texts. 

His favorite moment of her staying with him is when he found a small hand made basket near the front door. Right next to his farming boots while her small pair sat directly next to his. Armen was a jack of all trades, and she often didn’t sleep well, meaning that she crafted. Basket weaving was a craft she had learned in their early years and seeing it nestled next to _their_ boots made his heart stop; it was a sign that she planned on staying for a while...with _him._ The basket indicated that she was willing to help with farm chores, eggs from the chickens and collecting herbs near the edges of the property; she was willing to lend a hand and earn her keep while she stayed with him. 

Cornflowers and daises had slowly started making their way into tea tins that had sat dormant in Muriel’s home, adding a soft touch of life in his bland little home. He always felt a sense of relief upon seeing a new homely bouquet when he would come from work, a reminder that she was there...that she was in his life. Pretty, fresh, and soft. Just like the flowers, she decorated with. 

  
  
Armen never specified how long she would be in Ireland...there wasn’t much discussion of her returning to New York anytime soon. Though she did say she had given her few closet friends ways to contact her through phone and email, she unspokenly made it clear she wanted to withdraw from her life in New York...but not withdraw from her friends. 

Muriel had only heard of her life there through weekly phone calls and texts. He could never outright tell her that he was envious of those who got to see Armen regularly. That didn’t mean he wasn’t happy for her, he was thrilled that she had been able to go for her dreams and get them. How many people could say they had gone to college and been top of their class? How many had gotten their dream job?

Not many. 

But there was a sense of possessiveness when it came to her. Not in an unhealthy sense, simple longing and kinship. When she had called him to tell him the news of landing the job for the big league Avengers, he was thrilled for her (a little in disbelief, but thrilled none the less.) She had worked her butt off in school, saving up and working for every scholarship available so that she could become a top-notch therapist. 

He had seen the longing inside of her for a long time, like a bird looking for a chance to spring free from a cage...he knew that one day she would need to fly away from this place to pursue her dreams; fly away from him. 

Letting her go wasn’t easy...but the loneliness dulled over time. He felt comfort when she had told him that she had become close to the infamous Sam Wilson and Pepper Potts. She never dived much into her work time, (partly because she couldn’t for confidential reasons,) but he always smiled on the other end of the phone when she would excitedly tell him about her platonic friend coffee dates with Sam. 

He knew it wouldn’t take long for her to make friends, she was to easy to love and be around. That being said, he did dread the day that would one day come...how would he react when she would tell him about another guy? A romantic interest? Someone that wasn’t him? Sure, he had found the strength and understanding to let her go and live her life without him in New York; but that didn’t mean he couldn’t dread the day when she would call to talk about a possible love interest. 

It didn’t take long for him to notice the shift in her after spending a few months in the Avengers tower. She would always let him know about how challenging it had been for her to not be star struck when meeting the infamous Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanov. 

  
  


“Were they cool? Causal?” He asked gruffly into the phone while he fiddled around in his kitchen to make tea. 

“Oh, yeah! Steve was so polite and Natasha...man, she’s so gorgeous in person.” Armen mumbled. 

"Aren't they all freakishly good looking?" He asked as the scent of lavender tea filled his small kitchen. 

Lavender tea was Armen's favorite. He had been drinking a lot of the stuff lately...

"Yeah. It's a little unfair if you ask me." She huffed playfully.

"Why's that?" 

She paused, considering her words carefully. A new habit she had developed into her older years. She had mentioned she had to become a little different not that she had a real _adult job._

_"_ I'm just so...I'm so normal compared to them. There's not much special about me other than coming from Ireland and working my butt off to get here. Everyone here has worked hard their entire life, ya know?" 

Muriel hummed lightly while sipping the tea. He instantly felt relaxed as soon as it hit his taste buds.

"Stop your pity party, Armen. If you're insinuating that you _aren't_ attractive, I'ma call bullshit on that." He laughed. 

He could picture her rolling her pretty eyes at his statement. 

"Trust me, if you saw me next to Natasha, you would so  see how plain I look next to her." 

He sat his mug of tea down gentle on the counter. A light clink echoing through the phone call, an air of seriousness falling between the two of them.

"As far as I'm concerned, you've always been the prettiest girl I've ever known and will know." 

The silence on the end of her line didn't worry him, he knew she had a hard time seeing herself the way others did. Plus, he was becoming bolder with his feelings for her and seeing as she was halfway across the world, he didn't have to much to lose other than her possibly snapping at him or hanging up on the line. But she didn't. She simply took a small breath and thanked him for his compliment. 

Quickly changing the topic by sharing her recent coffee date with Sam Wilson who had decided to become Armen's new best friend in New York. Muriel didn't mind Sam. He sounded like a good guy, and he was happy that Armen had a male figure that wanted to look for her and spend time with her since he couldn't. 

He could picture her pacing back and forth in her small apartment in the tower. She had video chatted him, giving him a tour of the space. Clean and modern, simplistic and sterile. A space that didn’t suite the vibrant and colorful girl that had been hired to become a trauma counselor for the Avengers. He knew it wouldn’t take long for her to bring her touches into space...he knew it wouldn’t take long for her kindness to affect those around her. 

And sure enough, the dreaded phone call appeared about her effect on others. 

“I was able to meet Bucky Barnes today.” She stated simply. 

He stiffened. He felt the shift in her...even in a phone call. 

“Is he a nice as Steve? Is he how people have painted him to be?” Muriel asked. Hoping she couldn’t hear then tension in his voice. 

“He’s nothing how the media has painted him. But I knew that from the get-go. He was polite, cordial, withdrawn. As expected.”

Muriel took notice that Armen took care to not mention the solider very much; which meant that she either didn’t run him too much...or she was running into frequently and not telling him about it. Call it instinct or feeling, but growing up together with Armen allowed Muriel to know the full ends and outs of her behavior; she always wasn’t capable of lying. He felt it in his gut...that the Winter Solider had caught the interest of the pretty young redhead who was there to help others.

Call it intuition, call it jealousy, call it whatever you want…

But Armen leaving and moving into a new life without him and especially not telling him the full details of her first real love interest...fractured a huge part of their friendship. It was a wall, a place she wasn’t allowing him into…

  
  


But did that stop him from letting her come back home? No. Did that stop him from loving her? No. Did that stop him from feeling relief when she asked to come stay with him while recovered after the _incident?_ No. 

He was always going to be there for her. He was always going to love her...even if she had decided to let her first kiss, her first-ever romance be with someone other than him and half away across the world. 

Frankly, he hoped his patience would be rewarded in waiting it out for her. Would this be considered the friendzone on his part? Or was there more too this situation?

None of it mattered to him. The moment she had called him crying, he didn’t care what he had to do to make her happy again, all he could do was whisper sweet comforts into the phone while she tried to suppress her little sobs when she had called him a little over a year go.

“Love? Love...what’s wrong? Talk to me...what do you need?” Muriel asked tenderly. 

It killed him being so far away from her. It killed him that he still didn’t fully understand the dynamic of what had hurt her so deeply, he just knew that it had something to do with a steel blue-eyed soldier. 

“I’m leaving here. For a little while. I put in my resignation. I-I-I already spoke to Tony about it. He’s letting me go. I wanna come back-back-home.” She mumbled in between sobs. 

Tony was Armen's boss. Though Pepper had given her the interview for the job. She had mentioned that Tony had quickly become like a father figure to her. Though he required her work to be on time and well done, he always seemed to include her. Something she was grateful for. Whatever had happened to make her react like this...it had to have been terrible. 

There was a pause between the two of them, Muriel was in shock from her confession. This was sudden. Alarming. 

Armen took a few choking breaths before speaking again. Her voice raspy from crying.

“Can I please come home?” She asked softly. 

He could picture big hot tears rolling down her pretty face. Probably flushed red and puffy. 

  
“ _Always._ ”

* * *

Her mind began to wander. Remembering the small details of her arrival back home. 

Armen had come back to Ireland a little over a year ago, her world had been completely turned upside down from heartache and an accident that had occurred on the job; she was shaken to her core, not knowing where to go and ultimately left her life behind to flee back to the only place she truly found solace; Ireland. There were times however when Armen’s mind would simply find peace in being in her childhood friend’s presence, oftentimes that was enough to ease her creeping anxieties. In the back of her mind, she pushed away the ebbing whispers of _what if?_

Had she come back to Cork to run away from her traumas? Or had she come home to only find _home_ in the arms of her childhood friend? She often never indulged the thought. Shoving it down and away, compartmentalized until she either cracked from the pressure of ignoring her feelings for her circumstances...or until she would be confronted about it. 

But as Armen watched the figure of her friend wander back towards the small glen they shared, she felt her lips pull tightly together into a line. Muriel would never address her heartache, not once had he asked her why she had come running back home, to him. She could see millions of questions reflecting in his dark green eyes after their first embrace upon her arrival. His concern for her well being evident in how gently he held her, softly laying his large hand on the small of her back as he led to the car. He had always been gentle to her. 

But not once did he pry her with questions. Not once did he ever tire of her silent tears. He never complained when she would gently meet him in the living room in the late hours of the night, asking softly to sit next to him till she exhausted herself; she had a hard time sleeping after leaving New York, she had a hard time functioning like a normal person altogether after leaving her life behind. He would simply nod, moving aside so she could fit into the small sofa that could barely hold Muriel; though neither of them ever complained at the closeness that the chair provided for the both of them. 

They lived together platonically, despite what locals gossiped about the two friends. Though, if someone were to ever peak in upon the two and see them snuggled together, it would be all to easy to think they were an item. 

Muriel would move his legs for her, spreading them so that she could sit in the middle of him. Allowing her to slide into his frame, safely snug against his chest as he would casually wrap an arm around her waist. He knew touching her was unnecessary, but she never objected to his large hands softly tugging her closer to his chest. She never flinched when their legs would intangle together as they would lean back into the small sofa, her body nestled into his. 

This wasn’t...hasn’t been uncommon for them. It’s normal...safe, _home._

Some factors played into the closeness of physical interactions between the two; Armen is a very physical person. She often was known to excitedly hug people, friends. She had an air of comfort around her, often making it easy for her to reach out and touch someone’s hand or forearm when she would laugh, she enjoyed laughing with people. In all the years Muriel had known Armen, he had never seen someone dismiss her causal touches and gestures of closeness: She was a people person.

Muriel, however, is the polar opposite. Introverted and a social recluse. It’s often been wondered how the bright-eyed redhead ever befriended the tall silent giant. But somehow, the tiny girl of 5’7 had managed to enter the small social circle the ton hermit. Muriel lived on a small farm in Cork, not too far from town but isolated, enough at least. His family sold eggs, honey, and wool in the town market from their sheep, bees, and chickens; they did very well for themselves. 

Armen’s parents were a local nurse and midwife, something that intrigued Muriel at a young age. He never minded his simple home life, but he felt a desire to one day grow up to help others, something more than just tending to sweet animals (Though, if you knew the man...he loved animals. Especially chickens.)

Throughout their friendship, Armen’s parents helped Muriel look into a field of botanology and holistic medicine; something that interested him very much. He worked tirelessly in their teenage years, often leaving little time for adventures to town, a treat Armen dragged him into regularly. She would always pull him in with the promise of getting his favorite candy at the end of the day...Lemon drops. 

It didn’t help that Armen had grown into her looks in their teenage years either, only making it easier to cave into her pleas of a walk to town with the girl he was avoiding for study time. Armen had the prettiest dark red hair, like a burnt cinnamon. Gentle waves that would softly cascade over her milky shoulders. She always had glowing skin, soft-looking and plump. She had doll-like features, plump lips, and large almond-shaped eyes. 

She was an average height, but her legs and waist were long, a distraction that left Muriel feeling conflicted over in their older years. It didn’t help that she was a tiny bit plump, he found it to be appealing, attractive...

But she always held to her word; buying him the largest bag of lemon drops she could afford (He never knew, but she would always save up a little extra of her allowance to treat him to candy. He worked so hard to get his studies done, she wanted him to have something nice...especially since he would give up his time to indulge in her antics.)

They would always end these days the same, nestled together on a quilt she had made in her spare time. In a field of heather would be tossed by the wind, creating a magical effect as they shared Muriel’s favorite candy.

Muriel had always looked fearsome in a ruggedly handsome sort of way. Armen often would giggle about his appearance never matching his personality in their youth. They often spent time together reading in fields of heather, not far from the glen, Muriel’s home. 

“You know, it’s funny.” Armen would smile devilishly like she knew a secret he didn’t. 

Muriel played along, indulging the small redhead girl that sat next to him.

“What’s that?” He asked, his gravely voice soft from not speaking very much; Armen had enough energy for the both of them...she did a lot of the talking most of the time. 

She gleefully shut the book she had been reading, _Wuthering Heights,_ gently settling it on the ground as she leaned closer to Muriel. He glanced up from his texts of Runes, quirking an eyebrow at Armen.

“You look so...big and scary. Ya know? But in reality, you’re this big softie.” 

Her statement caught him off guard, though to be fair, most of the things that left her cupid’s bow lips left him dumbfounded; the girl had no filter and she was impulsive. Often leading her to blurt out bizarre comments, such as his appearance being big and scary…

“I scare you?” Muriel asked gently. 

He knew his entire life that he was huge, a giant. It didn’t help that his genetics followed in his father. His body had always been hulking...it’s partly why he had grown out his hair so that he could hide away from the stares of others. He didn’t like to think of the men that judged him for his size, starting rumors that he was a thug or trouble maker; that his size only allowed him to cause destruction. Nor the girls that would stare with lust towards him; there was only one person, one girl, who he didn’t mind looking at him…

  
  


Disappointment surging through him as he set his book aside as he peeked through his long hair as Armen. Her body language shifted instantly at his question, her bright blue eyes growing with alarm. Realizing her statement came as offense rather, she quickly began to mumble what she was hoping to convey to Muriel.

“What? No! No. I didn’t mean it like- what I’m saying is, there’s more to you than these big hulking muscles! There’s more to you than being known as the tallest guy in town who could probably kill someone with a spoon.”

She broadly gestured towards his frame. 

She was rambling, she was panicked, afraid she had wounded him. She would talk with her hands, gesturing broadly as she would look away from him, anywhere but Muriel as she tried to dig herself out of the awkward hole she had placed herself in; completely missing the soft smile of amusement on his face as he listened to her. 

“I’m messing this up aren’t I?” She asked, a little annoyed with herself.

“Tremendously.” He smirked. Amused at the slight blush creeping onto her pale creamy features. 

She huffed. Biting the inside of her cheek as she struggled to find the words. 

“I’m saying people shouldn’t judge you. They should get to know you. Hell, they should at this point!” Armen shrugged dramatically before continuing. 

“You’re the sweetest person that I know. Everyone knows how good you are to animals, how hard you’ve worked with your parents, how hard you’re working now.” 

Her eyes flickered to the texts of Rune that still sat to the side of Muriel. He didn’t understand where she was going with this…

“I’m just, I’m just, I’m trying to say- that you’re gonna prove them all wrong when you become a holistic doctor. You’re gonna show them how good you are.” 

Her confession warmed his heart. He considered her carefully that day, not knowing how long he had been in love with her, it had come so softly. He wasn’t even sure if this was just hormones and their time together that pressed his feelings further for the girl that was sitting so close to him. 

She thought he was _good_. 

She had never even given into the ridiculous rumors about him. She ignored the ramblings of people who told her that she shouldn't mingle with such a bad guy. She would just politely explain they didn't know her, they didn't know _him._ She never once judged him for his rugged looks, never once feared his hulking figure. She treated him like she did everyone else, she was thoughtful and kind to him. 

She must’ve seen the gears working in his head, plus the added silence that had grown tense between the two of them. They didn’t know what this was at the time of their youth, but Armen considered it to the rabbit hole. 

This was the moment she had decided in her teenage years, that she knew she had to do something. She had to change, leave, get away from the intensity of his green eyes. The same eyes that looked for her when they weren’t together. The same eyes that glinted with delight when she would spew utter nonsense for the sake of humor. The same eyes that no longer held platonic friendship...but something _more._

* * *

She had never come right out and said it, but she mentioned how Bucky was going out of his way to stop her office every so often. He never came for appointments, just tiny social mingles. But Muriel knew better. Men didn’t go out of their way to see a girl unless they had a motive; and who wouldn’t with her? Armen was to easy to be comfortable with and it didn’t help that she the epitome of Irish aesthetic when it came to looks. 

He only knew it would be a matter of time before someone took interest in her...but why did it have to be Bucky Barnes?


	2. Dropping the bomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Muriel arrives back home, back to Armen. 
> 
> He has something to tell her, relating to her old life. Not knowing how she'll feel or react while navigating through the strange relationship he has with his childhood friend, who he also happens to be in love with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!   
> I hope you enjoy this! I promise we'll get more as this goes on. 
> 
> This is a slow burn. 
> 
> We'll get unresolved sexual tension later. Promise.

Armen had been so caught up in her mind that she didn’t realize she had completely tensed up in the cushy armchair, jolting in place upon hearing the  _ clank _ of the front door opening. Muriel had made it across the Moores quickly, back to the cottage, where Armen had happily waited for him. Armen stretched her fingers and toes, moving her legs out from under here. Muscles tense and tingling from lack of use. Her homemade quilt slipping from her lap as she began to rise from the chair. She smiled softly, it not reaching her eyes as she self soothed herself by wrapping her arms around herself as the sound of heavy boots and soft padding of paws alerted Armen that Muriel was home. 

A large mass of fur with vibrant eyes came scurrying around the corner to Armen. A fluffy wide tail wagging happily as the wolf-dog, Inanna came to Amren excitedly. A soft huff could be heard from the dog as she trotted to the redhead, Armen reaching down to hold that animals face in her hands. 

“Hello, pretty thing! Did you have fun with Muriel?” Armen asked, a playful tone in her voice as she lovingly stroked the dog’s fur.

“It wasn’t as fun without you. She missed you!” Muriel huffed from the entryway. She could tell he was taking off his boots from the way his voice sounded gruff. Soon followed by the loud clunking of the shoes.

Muriel had gone out to town to check in on some patients who had been hindered by colds, sick children with runny noses being held by exhausted mothers, stressed from lack of sleep and constant crying. Muriel often brought along some herbs to give his patients, hoping they would bring ease and restfulness when lightly steeped in hot water. 

“So, you’re saying  _ you  _ didn’t miss me?” Armen asked, looking away from Muriel’s treasured pet and animal companion to see a very tired Muriel appeared in the archway of the entry hall. Leaning against the frame as he pushed up the long sleeves of his olive-green henley. Running a hand through his dark locks as he sighed heavily. He looked back at Armen with something of annoyance and fatigue. 

He was bothered by _something._ He looked like something was weighing on his mind.

“Do not even ask me that. You know I always want you with me. And besides, Inanna always behaves better when you’re around.” He sighed. His broad shoulders sagging with exhaustion. He ran his large hands over his face, Armen couldn’t help but smile at the large mountain man in his moment of fatigue. There was something about seeing such a strong man, tall and hulking, weary and looking for relief in his tiny home. 

  
  


Armen left Inanna, who was happily sitting at Armens feet. Following the redheaded girl as Armen walked to over to Muriel. Inanna deciding that if she wouldn’t receive pettings that she would simply curl up near the fireplace till dinner time; giving Armen and Muriel minor privacy as Armen raised her pale fingers to Muriel. Both her hands playing with the ends of his shirt as she trailed lightly up his tummy, settling softly on his sides. 

His body tensed at her touch, he was startled briefly. Soon he relaxed into her touch, removing his hands from his face to look down at her sweetly. Placing both of his hands to cup her face, soft skin, and milky complexion, her cupids bow lips forming a pleasing put as she smiled up to him. His body was warm against her, warm from his long walk back home. She looked comfortable in her Pj’s, her scent filling senses as she moved closer to his body, her tummy pressed firmly against him as he enjoyed the scent of chai tea; something Armen could be found sipping on. 

This physical intimacy was edging closer and closer towards something... _ different.  _

Something...that they both considered to be dangerous. 

The possibility of romance. 

It had been there, probably all of their lives. It was left unspoken, but Muriel knew in the pit of his heart that she felt it too, his love for her. Just like why she had come back to Ireland, they hadn’t addressed it. Muriel knew these talks would be ladened with the weight of dread, even unhinged anxiety. But as Muriel glided his thumbs softly over Armen’s high cheekbones, the feeling her face turning into his left palm, he swallowed. 

This caused her to cut her eyes at him curiously, her expression conveys an elongated,  _ Yes? _

  
  


Muriel regarded Armen carefully for a long time. The only sound in their room was there soft breathing. The soft morning glow running through the windows of the cottage as they stood together. This was their tiny bubble, their tiny moment. Armen could sense that Muriel was choosing his words to tell her something, and based on how intense the emotion in his eyes was...she was curious to know if it was bad news?

Her lower tummy tightened, anxiety now running through her muscles as Armen reached up to clasp her hands over his.

“Muri? Is something wrong?” She asked. Her voice sweet. 

She held his hands in hers, so tiny and pale compared to his strong calloused ones. He tightened his grip, ever so slightly as he finally spoke. “You got a letter in the mail today.”

Armen snorted. Who didn’t get mail? What was the big deal?

He sensed she was going to ask that exact question and suddenly, his grip firmed with her hands. An almost warning for her to not speak as he continued. 

“It’s from Tony.”

Armen instantly blanched, if it were even possible for the pale girl. Her fingers loosening from Muriel’s grip as she moved away from him. Slowly turning as if she were in a daze as she walked over to the fireplace where Inanna lay on the floor. Armen held herself, her fingertips digging into the meat of her arms as she tried to not acknowledge the elephant in the room.

But Muriel wasn’t having any of that. 

“Did you open it to see what it was?” She asked, not turning to look as she felt the floorboards shift under the weight of Muriel’s footsteps as he approached her from behind. 

“No. That’s rude  _ and _ illegal. But I’m guessing it’s not something detrimental? Because you both talk regularly, right?” His voice gentle as he cautiously placed his hands over hers, causing her to cease in digging into her upper arms. 

Her head turned to him slightly, but she didn’t flinch away from his touch as she  _ slightly  _ leaned back into him, barely noticeable. “Yeah, we talk about twice a week. He calls to make sure I’m doing okay, always begging me to come back for something or other. Asking me if we’re dating yet…” Muriel didn’t miss the hint of humor she added in the last sentence, that bother him slightly. But he pushed it away, for now. 

“So, why are you so bothered by getting a letter from Tony?” Muriel asked, expecting her to lean into his body, however, Armen quickly moved away from him as he had scolded her with hot water. She walked back over to the armchair near the window, still not facing him. He was puzzled at her behavior, she always acted withdrawn and lightly erratic whenever he mentioned anything relating to her old life. 

“It’s May,” Armen stated. Pinching the bridge of her nose with frustration. “Tony’s birthday is in May.” Armen finished. 

Muriel snorted. Shifting his weight as he put together her statement. “Are you upset because he didn’t send it in an email?” Muriel thought this was a normal question. But apparently, based on how Armen turns to look at him as if he has shot her...it’s an idiotic question.

“He probably did send it through email! Hell, he probably texted me!” Armen huffed. Her eyes were tinged a light red, tears threatening to spill over in the conversation (that was edging towards an argument based on the anxiety rising through the redhead.) Muriel shrugged, clearly at a loss for the point he was missing. 

Armen sighed dramatically as Muriel gestured broadly towards her with a facial expression reading,  _ What? What the hell is the problem here? _

“I haven’t seen Tony, any of them since…” She trailed off, looking away from Muriel, biting her lower lip. 

“Since you left.” He finished for her. 

She nodded. 

“I haven’t seen any of them since I came back. Not Tony, Pepp, Sam. Video chat doesn’t count...ya know?” She asked, her voice cracking slightly as she looked back at him helplessly. Muriel always there anything he felt or wanted out the window when she was this upset, he walked towards her. Gently shushing her as he opened his arms to her. 

Was he annoyed at her sudden outburst? Yes. 

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t try to comfort her and attempt to keep his cool, for the most part, in trying to understand why she was so exasperated. He was pleased when she shuffled towards him; allowing him to wrap his arms around her shoulders, pulling Armen protectively into his chest. After a few moments of silence, He leaned back to look down at her playfully, quicking a crooked smirk at her as she withheld her tears. 

“You gonna tell me why you’re so upset about one of your best friends and former boss sending you a birthday invite?” He asked, amusement clear in his voice as she wiped away early tears slipping from her puffy eyes. 

“First of all, Pepper probably sent them. God knows Tony couldn’t do that shit on his own. He can’t do anything without that woman.” Armen joked. 

  
  


_ He knew the feeling… _

He snorted at her joke. Armen had grown close to the Starks, Pepper had quickly become a confidant for Armen, someone to go have lunch with when their schedules aligned. Girl time had never really occurred for Armen, seeing as she had stuck to Muriel like glue through their entire upbringing. Muriel always enjoyed when Armen spoke of her time with Pepper, they seemed close; a treasured friendship between two hard-working women. 

“I’m upset because I have to go,” Armen mumbled. “I have to go because they’ve been patient with me. I have to go because they’re my friends, my other family.” She looked up at Muriel, fearful that her declaration would insinuate that he wasn’t as important as her other friends. He nodded, hoping she could see that he was deterred by her feelings. 

“I’m upset because I know going back means I have to pick up the pieces of what I left behind. I have to consider where’ I’m going from this point on.” Muriel tensed under her words, he didn’t like the implication in this fact neither of them had addressed. The possibility of her going back. They both understood the complications of her both staying in Ireland and reconsidering New York, her old job, her old life,  _ her old love interest… _

“I already know it’s going to be hard going back, seeing them all. Seeing…” She trailed off. 

“Him.” Muriel finished for her once again. 

She looked up to her handsome friend, her caretaker, her champion. The man who allowed her to leave him, to go into a life without him. The man who had been in love with her for so long. The man who was patient, kind, and considerate towards her feelings despite how fluttered and erratic she is. The man who was now facing the possibility of losing her again... _ unless… _

“Wanna be my plus one?” Armen blurted out. 

The tension in the room was instantly gone now. Muriel looking up and way from Armen as he tried to process what she asked. He laughed lightly, moving away from her body but running his hands down her arms. 

“What?” He asked, humming happily in amusement at her quirkiness.

“You wanna be my plus one? Muri?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, cinnamon rolls!
> 
> I hope y'all liked this! I'm really fond of this, and I'm a little sad it's had so few reads. But...I'm hoping with time it'll get better. It makes me sad when people are only in it for smut. But...we gotta start somewhere, right?
> 
> I tried to convey that Armen has a processing issue. I hope it came through that she likes to run away from her problems.


	3. Before and After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get a tiny bit of insight into when Armen first appeared in Bucky's life. 
> 
> A quick aftermath of the present: when Armen is suspected to return to the Avengers tower to celebrate Tony Stark's birthday. Something Bucky is both excited and fearful of. 
> 
> He reflects on the possibilities of how Armen will react to seeing him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Cinnamon Rolls!  
> I'm so excited this is getting a few more reads! I haven't spoken to one of my favorite fanfiction writers, but she is a huge inspiration for me with this fic. She wrote a Bucky/reader fanfic called, Silver and Honey.
> 
> It's absolutely amazing and one of my favorites! It's so lengthy and story-oriented. If you have time, go check it out.
> 
> I finally added some Bucky! BUT NOT MUCH...
> 
> BECAUSE I WANT YOU ON EDGE LOL

_Before…_

_Before Armen leaving..._

  
  
  


Bucky’s bedroom was dull. 

Empty. 

It didn’t even look as if he stayed there. 

He had been sitting, thinking far too much in the stark white apartment. The only decoration he had bothered with was a few pictures from Steve. One of the two of them during the war, laughing full and hearty together. Bright smiles excited eyes. Another was a drawing Steve had made, something from their past, the outside of Bucky’s childhood home; He appreciated the piece and the time Steve had taken to create it. 

His bedroom, a fluffy white duvet that he often never used. He hardly slept in the bed, he hardly slept at all. Too soft…Plus, his mind would not shut off. He was fatigued, but he kept it under control whenever missions, team exercises, and training were involved. 

He had come leaps and bounds in his recovery in being placed into the Avengers. The tension had melted away from his body after staying, healing, in Wakanda. Shuri kept in close contact with Bucky, he enjoyed their bond, their friendship. 

There had been an awkward period when Steve was the only one associating with Bucky, not that he blamed anyone. Though he had been cleared of the crimes he had been accused of, there was still a stigma, a tension, between him and the team whenever he entered a room. He appreciated that no one addressed it, but it was unspokenly known that the team, especially Sam Wilson and Tony, were having a hard time with him being there ...again, not that he blamed them.

Steve wouldn’t get off his ass about seeing a therapist, a counselor, _something_.

Bucky was stubborn though, and for the most part...doing well for himself. He didn’t mind the isolation. When it came to missions, the team had solid communication and included him in on everything; just not in the brief moments of casual laughter and conversations.

Sure, the kid, Peter Parker, had taken interest in the Winter Soldier, (Peter referred to Bucky as Mr. Jesus, much to Bucky’s dismay,) But Steve had taken a shining to the kid, thus, so did Bucky. Natasha did her best, making snarky comments here and there to lighten the mood. Bucky was thankful she never addressed the past, _their_ past. She didn’t go out of her way to include him, but she did strive to make him feel accepted outside of missions: he appreciated it. 

Sam always had a hard time with Bucky. 

Bucky could always see the strain it took for Sam to not snap at Bucky or make a snide comment. Somehow, Falcon managed to keep his cool though. Bucky had suspected it had something to do with the new girl. Steve seemed to have liked her, mentioned that she was professional and polite. Bucky didn’t miss the gleam in Steve’s eyes though when Bucky asked if she was pretty. 

The shit-eating grin on Steve Rogers’s face. 

Bucky snorted. 

Knowing Steve was silently insinuating that Bucky stop by and see the new girl, pretty and fresh, sweet and polite: and to boost...she’s a trauma counselor. 

“Killing two birds with one stone, Aye? Stevie?” Bucky teased. Giving a hard smack to the back of Steve shoulders. 

“Listen, bud, you can’t blame a guy for trying to set up his best friend with a pretty girl.” Bucky turned to glare at Steve, all jokes aside, Steve had an unnecessary tendency to meddle where he didn’t belong. And in regards to the potential love life of the Winter Soldier…Steve didn’t need to get involved as a wingman. 

“ _Steve._ If I wanna go to a counselor, I will. If she just so happens to be attractive and single, what chance do I have?” Bucky asked with annoyance. Walking away from Steve, who now looked taken aback by Bucky’s comment. 

“Buck, not to sound _super_ homo or anything, but you’re a total catch! Bud!” Bucky scoffed at Steve. Not even acknowledging his friend keeping up with him as they walked to Bucky’s apartment. Steve and Bucky lived on the same level in the tower, while lower-level agents and workers had their homes outside of the Tower. 

“That’s homo. You sure you don’t got a thing for Sam? Should I be worried? Is this why you were so interested in watching the Pride parade the other day?” Bucky teased. Not missing the agitation rising in Steve’s eyes as he leveled Bucky with a glare. 

They reached Bucky’s door, just down the hall from Steve before the blonde super soldier eyed his best friend. Steve shifted his weight while looking at Bucky pleadingly before speaking again. “At least go say hi. Meet her so it’s not weird. Ya know?” Steve asked. Bucky considered Steve’s request, what the hell...he didn’t have anything to lose _if_ he ran into the girl. 

But he wasn’t going to out of his way to meet her. He was settled on not looking for a counselor or love life, but he could be polite if they ran into one another. 

“Fine..Fine! Just leave me alone, punk.” Bucky drawled. Opening his bedroom door to slip into, away from his best friend. Steve was beaming with pride, clearly proud of himself that Bucky finally agreed after his pestering. 

“Great! You’ll love her Buck!” 

At that, Bucky slammed the door in Steve’s face.

He let out a sigh, completely tired of Steve’s teenage matchmaking efforts. But even with the door closed, he couldn’t escape. 

“She’s Irish!” Steve yelled from the other side of the door. 

Bucky had been sitting near his living room window ever since Steve left him alone. Pondering on why Steve was so fixated on setting him up with someone. It meant everything, _everything_ to Bucky that Steve had fought for him, believed in him and wanted to help him out. 

Bucky hadn’t thought of it much, but he did like the idea of Steve finding a girl one day, settling down. He could get to be Uncle Bucky! A thought that seemed ridiculous to the Winter Soldier, but partly true. It was only natural to want what’s best for your loved ones…

Maybe Steve just wanted to make sure Bucky had someone when he wasn’t around?

Bucky glanced around the white bedroom. Understanding that it was a reflection of himself, to a point. Well kept, but empty and lifeless. He sighed, annoyed with himself for lingering on this for way longer than he should’ve. Worst comes to worst...He introduces himself, and they keep a cordial and polite distance. Best case scenario? 

He has someone he could have a small chit chat with. 

Yeah, Bucky could stand that. 

* * *

_Present-day..._

Bucky had been anxiously tapping his foot against his leg for an hour in his apartment. He had been counting down the days since she had left; _hell,_ he had been counting down the days to Tony Stark’s fucking birthday! It had been a little over a year since Armen had left, completely resigned and went God knows where. She had completely cut him off, hell, she even cut off Steve and Nat. The only people he knew she kept in contact with were Sam, Tony, and Pepper; and all three never favored him...especially in regards to Armen. 

Sure, she wasn’t an Avenger. She played a small role in their lives, and that was only if they made an appointment with her. Although, Bucky only ever had to knock on her office door. He loved catching her mid-way through paperwork. She would turn so prettily, curiosity painted on her face until she realized who was leaning against her doorframe. 

A light dusting of pink would appear on her cheeks. She’d flash a shy smile. “Hello, James.” She would softly say. 

_God,_ he missed hearing his names on her lips. He missed stopping by to see her. He missed making her smile. He missed her shy smiles and soft blushes. He missed her…

She had made sure to clarify on her paperwork that she wanted her contact information to be kept confidential. She didn’t want to speak to him, she didn’t want him to find her. God knows he could if he wanted too! But he knew that would break a boundary, it would be crossing a line.

But Goddamn it...did he miss his favorite Irish girl. 

He wasn’t sure if she would even attend the party. She hadn’t contacted anyone except for the three people that blamed him for her leaving the job, for leaving them. He assumed that she would politely decline, just to avoid him. 

He had been waiting in his living all day to try and keep it together. He had momentarily lost it after she left. He felt guilty, he felt dirty, he had a hard time swallowing that he was the reason she had probably left the country. 

Why else would she keep her info so tight? She had to be out of the country. He had started to look for her...god knows he went to the coffee shop she and Sam went too regularly, hoping to spot her. No dice. 

He had gone out to multiple parks, looking everywhere for a tiny redhead that could be found reading a book up in a tree. Like some wild mythical being. But no dice. 

He stopped looking after a week. He stopped trying to give into his false hope that she would possibly return. The only source of comfort he found was in trying to listen in on Tony and Sam’s conversations, but even then...she was kept hidden away from him. Safe and a secret. 

What if she did show up to the party? Would she speak to him? Would she even bother to look his way? He had run over millions of different scenarios countless times in his mind if she ever returned. All of them ending with him being justly shut out and Armen shutting him out, for good. 

Did she look different? 

Had she changed much? 

Was her hair still long and red?

Did she still smell like Chai tea? Like a gingerbread cookie?

Bucky didn’t know. 

He just knew he had been sitting in his apartment, contemplating far too long on a girl that most likely moved on from him. But what if she did come back? What if she did speak to him? Adknowledge him? He rubbed his hands over his face. Weary and tired at the thought.

If that was an option if Armen gave him the time of day…

He wasn’t going to waste it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading sweet cinnamon rolls! <3
> 
> I hope this isn't too disappointing. I feel like if I don't have my fanfictions flooded with smut...they don't get reads. Which is super disheartening. 
> 
> I had a really hard time writing this chapter. It's very simple. 
> 
> I feel like Bucky's mindset is just that...simple. Very quick and to the point, not super elaborate. So...I tried to go for that vibe in the writing.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> I've been struggling with my self-esteem in my writing works. Plus, I am always thinking about much I don't like my ideas. But I wanted to rehaul this thing...so, we're gonna see how this works out. :)
> 
> Please, please, please be understanding that I have a plot for this. That means I'm not just going to do a big reveal instantly. I want it to be over time and progressive. 
> 
> I also apologize if this first chapter is clunky. I sort of wanted to deliver to viewpoints from the reader and Muriel. The reader is so all over the place, high energy. So I wanted her viewpoints to feel that way. While Muriel's is just...clunky.  
> I hope that shows.
> 
> I also had it to where Bucky cheats on the reader in this story. I ended up throwing that idea out the window for a more angsty reason for a complicated relationship. Bucky will casual mess in this. He's gonna be out of place and struggling to find himself.
> 
> Please check out my Tumblr cdrash13 for my more personal works.


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